A Persian Zoroastrian professor was teaching a class on classical history

”Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Xerxes and accept that the Persian satrapy system was the greatest form of government in the ancient world, even greater than Athenian Democracy!”

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, hoplite from Athens who had fought in phalanx hundreds of times and understood the necessity of a powerful Athenian navy and fully supported all military decision made by the Strategoi stood up.

”Who's the greatest ruler in history, helot?”

The arrogant professor smirked quite Iranianly and smugly replied “Xerxes, you stupid Greek”

”Wrong. It’s Themistocles. If it was Xerxes as you say… then wouldn't he have won at Salamis?”

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Shahnameh. He stormed out of the room crying those persian crocodile tears. The same tears persians cried when Athens supported their Greek brothers of the eastern Aegean in their revolt against the “king of kings” when they justly sought to overthrow their Persian oppressors. There is no doubt that at this point our professor wished he had pulled himself up by his bootstraps and become more than a Persiaboo hack.

The students applauded and became hoplite citizen-soldiers sworn to defend the Polis that day and accepted Pericles as their strategos and savior. An owl named “Athenian Democracy” flew into the room and perched atop the Greek Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The Odyssey was read several times, and Athena herself showed up and implemented direct democracy for all adult male citizens.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He tried to flee back east to his shit "empire" but Poseidon sent him to the bottom.

ΑΘΗΝΑΙΩΝ