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1. roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Wednesday, 16-Sep-2020 23:37:43 JST roka

   • roka
   I want to erase @roka again. There doesn't seem to be much point in this anymore ehhh7c3048b95265b0206c65742c95eef49…
   • roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Wednesday, 16-Sep-2020 23:44:14 JST roka

     in reply to

     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @Ricotta no, it's because this network is a flouridated pile of shit and my jokes stopped being funny a long time ago. In fact, it's an effort to make more of them for a variety of reasons. Maybe I'm burn out, maybe it's just another phase (I did want to purge @roka maybe a month after starting it) but there doesn't seem to be much fun left here. Part of why I started spamming chubas - at least they're cute, unlike my trash.
   • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship: (ricotta@yggdrasil.social)'s status on Wednesday, 16-Sep-2020 23:44:15 JST Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:

     in reply to
     @roka Is this because Amelia told us all to get our shit together and stop obsessing over imaginary women?
   • roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Wednesday, 16-Sep-2020 23:45:42 JST roka

     in reply to

     • an actual bear in a hazmat suit
     @guizzy nah, it would be exactly the same as it wasshark_gosling.png
   • an actual bear in a hazmat suit (guizzy@pleroma.guizzyordi.info)'s status on Wednesday, 16-Sep-2020 23:45:44 JST an actual bear in a hazmat suit

     in reply to
     @roka It would be a shame tbh
   • roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 00:29:46 JST roka

     in reply to

     • 御園はくい
     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @hakui @Ricotta pic unrelatedrep8.png
   • 御園はくい (hakui@tuusin.misono-ya.info)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 00:29:47 JST 御園はくい

     in reply to

     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @roka @Ricotta you don't have to be funny to be around though *hug*
   • roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 01:20:14 JST roka

     in reply to

     • Boris MP
     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @boris @Ricotta NEET Nep?
   • Boris MP (boris@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 01:20:17 JST Boris MP

     in reply to

     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @roka @Ricotta "But doctor, I am the chemotherapy."I still get a bit of regret over not saving the NEET Nep and Berserk Merlin fanfic/copypastas every now and then.Hatoba_Tsugu hambaga.jpg
   • roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 01:23:07 JST roka

     in reply to

     • Boris MP
     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @boris @Ricotta you mean that one with IF being bullied by Noire starting with an issue revolving around inability to borrow a city bicycle? I have them and can repost.
   • Boris MP (boris@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 01:25:53 JST Boris MP

     in reply to

     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @roka @Ricotta the ones in which Neptune acts in levels of neet selfishness that cause disasters at bicycle racks and supermarkets, with Noir out for blood (or normalcy, or something).Yes those.nep_tophat.png
   • roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 01:25:53 JST roka

     in reply to

     • Boris MP
     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @boris @Ricotta yeah, that's the one. It was IF though. What an adventure I had, you won't believe it! I was in Lastation today and tried to borrow that famous city bike they have.My mom made a special bank account for me and put 20 credits on it so I felt like the queen of the world :3 So I'm standing before these bikes, pressing the buttons - and nothing happens! I approach one in particular, attempt to yank it out of the electronic lock - it doesn't yield. I'm starting to feel worse and worse, can't catch my breath, social anxiety hits hard and, as usual, my plans of finally becoming an alpha bitch and not remaining a virgin NEET loser forever won't work because these fucking metal pieces of shit don't want to detach. Confusion is growing, people are starting to point at me and even Loweesian tourists passing by are starting to take photos of me. Suddenly, out of fucking nowhere, the famous CPU of Lastation, Black Heart, appears. "Girl, what the fuck are you doing?", she asks me in a calm voice. I admit I went a bit pale at that because she's quite formidable - very /fa/ and with massive (well, compared to mine) boobs. "Miss Lady Black Heart, m'am, this thing doesn't want to detach," I replied, my legs feeling as if they were made out of pudding. "There's a trick to it," the CPU of the Land of Black Regality told me. "Come over here, little girl, and put in the code your mommy paid for." I approach the machine which looks a bit like a parking meter, around me is a crowd of really fucking pissed cyclists - some want to return their bikes, some want to borrow them. But Lady Black Heart just sent them a glare and the faggots immediately shut up. I put in the code, the lock beeped and released. "Watch how it's done," said Lady Black Heart and tries to pull out the bike with one hand. Nothing happened. She huffed and puffed, and tried again. Again, nothing. Finally she got really pissed off, started to make noises almost like some kind of a moose, she ripped almost all of her clothes off (except for her lewd black panties) and started to kick the bikes, punch the machine with her fists. From her mouth, white foam was flowing freely and you could see the extreme strain on her muscles. Eventually she tensed up, gripped the bicycle, ripped it out along with a piece of the bike stand and threw it down the street, hitting a bus carrying retarded schoolchildren. The driver of said bus lost control of the vehicle and drove right into a bus stop filled with the elderly while Lady Black Heart was still making horrible beastly noises while staring at the sky. "What the fuck are you doing, you fucking whore?!", I yelled unable to bear this terrible sight. Then I was subject to verbal violence because she hit me in the fucking face with all her might. When I fell, she began to kick me while screaming "for my failed cosplay project, you whoredaughter". People tried to stop her but she defeated them all with one swoop of her hand. While I was losing consciousness due to severe damage to my head, I saw her pull out a double-necked electric guitar from her skimpy panties. She sat upon it and, while screaming "ahoy, adventure!" and grinding her crotch back and forth, flew off on somewhere behind the buildings. I woke up in a hospital from where I'm writing this post. I sincerely do not recommend knowing, or befriending, the CPU of Lastation. Especially since the Basilicom notified me about the damages that were done to their stand while I was using my account. I owe them 14000 credits now and regret leaving my home for the first time in two years. P.S. it's true --- It's me again. Do you remember how a few days ago I tried to borrow a city bike in Lastation and it was a total catastrophy? I managed to leave the hospital now and have to admit that I attempted to win at life once again. That is, mommy convinced me after a long talk in the night to not shut myself again. I love mommy :3 The weather was rainy so I had nowhere to go. Feeling ironical, I decided to head out to the indoor pool. You know, lots of people around (hard at work fighting my social anxiety xD) but despite that zero chances for some major interactions. I changed my boxers (they were starting to smell badly at this point) for bear-print panties and headed out for Lastation's pool. I paid 6 credits for entry to an older lady who smiled sweetly at me (thankfully I managed to keep my cool - a huge success!), got a key to a locker and a wristband to attach that key (to not lose it). I put on a breathing mask and like an alpha bitch headed out to conquer the city pool, filled with hope that it'll be okay and maybe there'll be some fucking involved - that is some yuri tongue licking with these fabled 3d pigs. I was about to jump head-first like a fucking boss when I noticed some commotion. A group of people was surrounding a famed Goddess of Lastation, Black Heart. Allow me to interject that she is also my personal nemesis after the adventure from a few days ago. Lady Black Heart was telling a story about how she threw a bike at a bus filled with retarded schoolchildren and everyone around was enjoying it and laughing loudly. In a flash, I started to feel nauseous, my heart was beating way too fast and wanted to flee as fast as I could. However, Lady Black Heart was faster. "Hey, look at that girlie. She's the one who got 20 credits from her mommy so that she could ride a bike!" yelled the CPU of Lastation. The entire pool suddenly went quiet as she started to slowly head in my direction. My legs felt like pudding once again. "Where did you get those bear-print panties, girl? Did you steal them from a child's clothing store?", she yelled. The entire population of pool started to laugh at me uproariously. Faced with such humiliation and keeping in mind that she owes me 14000 credits for the destroyed bikes, I tell her patiently: "Lady Black Heart, m'am, please stop or I will call the police. I won't demand you give me money for the damages you made but please leave me be." These words only enraged her. She immediately pulled her double-headed electric guitar from somewhere, yelled "for my failed cosplay project", she shot at me a laser beam. This time, however, I was prepared - I jumped to the side and avoided it (but still felt the heat of the laser beam.) "That's enough, I'm calling the police!", I said while pulling one of my mobile phones from a waterproof belt I had with me (I don't leave my phones anywhere because they help me keep calm.) "You wanna call the cops, whore? Call the pigs on me?!", Lady Black Heart couldn't handle my words. A second head started to grow from her neck while her neck was becoming longer and longer. At one point I noticed she also grew a tail and really started to look like a hydra. "I am Poseidon, Lord of the seas and oceans, whoredaughter!", she yelled while raising her hands - behind her the pool water started to ominously bubble. She aimed her hand at me and the entirety of the pool water shot into me with full power. I remember, when I was losing consciousness due to lack of air and being banged on the walls of the pool, seeing Lady Black Heart taking her shirt off through misty eyes. She yelled "I'm a penguin" and crawled on her belly to the drain on the bottom of the pool, where she disappeared in the darkness. All my phones were destroyed after my waterproof belt burst. Additionally, I'll have to clean all the seaweeds from the walls and roof of the pool in order to avoid being sued. I lost at life. P.S. it's true --- I myself can't believe what has happened. I told you about previous events twice now but today something entirely new occured. Mom had to be taken to the hospital due to stress caused by me having to clean the pool so, as it should be, I went to visit her with flowers. Unfortunately the hospital had to be evacuated because terrorist group Anonymous Gamindustri announced there's a bomb in that building so they didn't let me visit my mom ;_; Well, anyway, since I already had to leave my room, I decided to visit a mall and buy some delicious cheap food and since mom wouldn't cook anything, it was a time to gain +5 to being an alpha bitch and get some instant noodles. Mom's hospital was close to a mall *and* a metro station so I thought it was a good idea. I wasn't in hurry since the mall was open until 21 and it was merely 14. First, I got myself a hot dog from a street vendor, sat on a bench in the park and stared at cute girls walking :3 They were pretty, in cute dresses because weather was nice today. Then I went to a multimedia store and, obviously, I went to see the latest mobile phones first, then to the vidya section to see what new is sold there. I didn't get any new games though since there should be sales soon - I decided to wait until next Wednesday. Eventually I got to the mall and, walking from an aisle to aisle, I noticed delicious "value" line instant ramen with eggplant flavor. Since mom was not at home, I also got some pretzels and beer - I could be an alpha bitch - queen of the jungle tonight and fuck, that is, do some licking, that is, in truth just lurk cheerfully throughout the entire night without mom bothering me to fucking go to sleep already. Imagine my surprise when, passing by the meat section of the mall, I noticed that my number one enemy - Lady Black Heart herself - is wrapping a chicken leg (for only 12 credits!) for a client. As I'm standing there unable to move, with shock and rage coursing through my veins, she's calmly putting a just-weighted ribs (only 16 credits!) to some lady's shopping cart. Finally I understood what she does for a living and wanted to avoid her because I still have calluses from cleaning that pool but suddenly, like a spooky skeleton ghost, I hear from behind me "You, the bike girl whose mommy made an account for her, give me 5 credits or you're getting punched!" I suddenly started to feel hot all over my body. I replied that I don't have any credits. Without uttering a word or even changing her expression, the CPU of Lastation bitch slapped me. I swayed a little but managed to not fall over. Then I noticed a second slap aimed at my face. I quickly grabbed fish fingers ("value" line, 250g, "Delicious fish sticks in crunchy gold breadcrumb coating. Healthy fish in the form favored by children across the world - perfect for a fish dish for fish-haters!") and used the box to slap her hand back. She didn't like it one bit so, like some kind of a demented robot, she started to rush at me with two teflon frying pans (still left-over from a Valentine's Day sale) in both hands while yelling "for my failed cosplay project, you whore!" Everything was falling down on the floor, people were running around in panic, glass is shattering everywhere. Then, I suddenly grab two packets of pasta (3 credits each) and put them in the shape of a cross. "IT BURRRRRNS", the Goddess of Lastation screams while black smoke starts to billow from her body (starting from her crotch area.) Then, without any warning whatsoever, she was on fire and jumped into a huge aquarium with live fish and I'm filled with joy because security is rushing in. Then I faint. However when I came to, I was told that Lady Black Heart, the CPU of Lastation never worked for them. She's not on the recordings from CCTV either - it looks like I'm jumping around and crashing into aisles alone while she strangely was invisible to the cameras. They charged me with costs of all damages, my mom is dying in the hospital and I'm being sent to an asylum. I do not recommend that to anyone. I'm also very scared for my mom and they want to take our home to pay off some of the debts. And I just wanted to eat some pretzels and drink a few beers ;_; P.S. it's true
   • Boris MP (boris@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 02:24:14 JST Boris MP

     in reply to

     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @roka @Ricotta it shines through but my reduced exp with /fanfic/ and migrating from imageboards with much copypasta I couldn't really put it here nor there in my mind's tags.
     roka likes this.
   • Boris MP (boris@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 02:24:15 JST Boris MP

     in reply to

     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @roka @Ricotta That's the stuff, just like how remembered.The dong has expanded.gif
   • roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 02:24:15 JST roka

     in reply to

     • Boris MP
     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @boris @Ricotta it's actually slightly rewritten and poorly translated by me pasta originally about a famous and pretentious polack celebrity musician
   • roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 02:25:33 JST roka

     in reply to

     • Boris MP
     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @boris @Ricotta I'm considering writing something ridiculous about hololive but probably in normal prose as well – not greentext. Some ideas are floating around but it'd have to be some ridiculous scenario (and probably only slightly lewd)
   • Boris MP (boris@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 02:36:54 JST Boris MP

     in reply to
     @roka also>poorly translatedLet me leech off of you some more and ask what were the resources you named offhand some month or so ago for solidifying your english grammar.ah, there is actually something…
   • roka (roka@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 02:36:54 JST roka

     in reply to

     • Boris MP
     @boris by that I meant that I deliberately employed broken language, same thing happened with the homosexual bobsledders fanfic. It just looks funnier this way.

     I'd recommend Thomson & Martinet's A Practical English Grammar – it's slightly outdated but also extremely comprehensive and a good almost pocket reference. You can find it in library genesis, I got my dead tree copy second hand from some girl on uni's linguistics department when I was 8 years old and still studying. New it'd probably be expensive, even the low-priced edition. Most language learning materials are :cirnoForReals:

     For speaking practice, you'd probably do well with learning English sounds (possibly with a manual, How Now Brown Cow by Mimi Ponsonby is decent if you can also source the audio tape dumps – it's very hard to verify if you're making mistakes without them but the tiny blurbs about setting your mouth for each sound are useful), IPA and just finding a dedicated pronunciation dictionary. I have one by Longman, it's good. Any „normal” dictionary would have IPA pronunciation attached but dedicated dictionaries also feature variations.

   • Boris MP (boris@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 02:37:10 JST Boris MP

     in reply to

     • Ricotta :windmilloffriendship:
     @roka @Ricotta lewdness is a small but customary toll in virtual tubes after all.VY_u_MiraiAkari_KizunaAI.jpg
     roka likes this.
   • Boris MP (boris@pl.smuglo.li)'s status on Thursday, 17-Sep-2020 02:44:34 JST Boris MP

     in reply to
     @roka on it.serious.png
     roka likes this.