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Thing I had to look up: how private messages work on Mastodon.

"Sending a direct message
Although privacy is Mastodon’s big sell, it’s not immediately obvious how to send a direct message on the service. You do so by clicking the globe icon ? just below the toot text box. Select “Direct” and your message will only be seen by users who you mention. The globe icon should also have changed to an ✉️ envelope icon." https://qz.com/951078/the-complete-guide-to-using-mastodon-the-twitter-twtr-alternative/